Heart and Home

33 The Lord spoke to Moses and Aaron, saying, 34 “When you come into the land of Canaan, which I give you for a possession, and I put a case of leprous disease in a house in the land of your possession, 35 then he who owns the house shall come and tell the priest, ‘There seems to me to be some case of disease in my house.’ 36 Then the priest shall command that they empty the house before the priest goes to examine the disease, lest all that is in the house be declared unclean. And afterward the priest shall go in to see the house. 37 And he shall examine the disease. And if the disease is in the walls of the house with greenish or reddish spots, and if it appears to be deeper than the surface, 38 then the priest shall go out of the house to the door of the house and shut up the house seven days. 39 And the priest shall come again on the seventh day, and look. If the disease has spread in the walls of the house, 40 then the priest shall command that they take out the stones in which is the disease and throw them into an unclean place outside the city. 41 And he shall have the inside of the house scraped all around, and the plaster that they scrape off they shall pour out in an unclean place outside the city. 42 Then they shall take other stones and put them in the place of those stones, and he shall take other plaster and plaster the house.

43 “If the disease breaks out again in the house, after he has taken out the stones and scraped the house and plastered it, 44 then the priest shall go and look. And if the disease has spread in the house, it is a persistent leprous disease in the house; it is unclean. 45 And he shall break down the house, its stones and timber and all the plaster of the house, and he shall carry them out of the city to an unclean place. 46 Moreover, whoever enters the house while it is shut up shall be unclean until the evening, 47 and whoever sleeps in the house shall wash his clothes, and whoever eats in the house shall wash his clothes.

48 “But if the priest comes and looks, and if the disease has not spread in the house after the house was plastered, then the priest shall pronounce the house clean, for the disease is healed. 49 And for the cleansing of the house he shall take two small birds, with cedarwood and scarlet yarn and hyssop, 50 and shall kill one of the birds in an earthenware vessel over fresh water 51 and shall take the cedarwood and the hyssop and the scarlet yarn, along with the live bird, and dip them in the blood of the bird that was killed and in the fresh water and sprinkle the house seven times. 52 Thus he shall cleanse the house with the blood of the bird and with the fresh water and with the live bird and with the cedarwood and hyssop and scarlet yarn. 53 And he shall let the live bird go out of the city into the open country. So he shall make atonement for the house, and it shall be clean.”

54 This is the law for any case of leprous disease: for an itch, 55 for leprous disease in a garment or in a house, 56 and for a swelling or an eruption or a spot, 57 to show when it is unclean and when it is clean. This is the law for leprous disease. – Leviticus 14:33-57 ESV

These verses appear to anticipate the Israelite’s occupation of the land of Canaan. In preparation for the day when they would enter and occupy the land promised to them by God, the Israelites were provided with laws concerning the contamination of permanent dwelling places. Up until this point, they had been living in tents but the day was coming when God would allow them to occupy houses built of stone. And one of the significant features of their new homes would be the fact that they would inherit them from the land’s current occupants.

“The Lord your God will soon bring you into the land he swore to give you when he made a vow to your ancestors Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. It is a land with large, prosperous cities that you did not build. The houses will be richly stocked with goods you did not produce. You will draw water from cisterns you did not dig, and you will eat from vineyards and olive trees you did not plant. When you have eaten your fill in this land, be careful not to forget the Lord, who rescued you from slavery in the land of Egypt. You must fear the Lord your God and serve him.” – Deuteronomy 6:10-13 NLT

This entire section of Leviticus is concerned with the holiness of God. The emphasis on cleanness and uncleanness is meant to illustrate how the fallen nature of the world and everything in it can negatively impact the Israelite’s relationship with God. Impurity of any kind could place a barrier between Yahweh and His chosen people. And when the Israelites finally arrived in Canaan and began conquering the nations that had settled there, the land would need to be purified. Even the houses in which they settled, which would be given to them by God, would be prone to disease and contamination.

And in these verses, God provides detailed instructions for dealing with mold and mildew that appear in a home. What sets this section apart is verse 34. In it, God seems to indicate that this mold infestation will be from His hand.

“When you arrive in Canaan, the land I am giving you as your own possession, I may contaminate some of the houses in your land with mildew.” – Leviticus 14:34 NLT

Does this suggest that God will inflict certain homes with mold and mildew as some kind of punishment for a sin committed by the occupant? The text doesn’t elaborate. While it seems that God is claiming responsibility for the presence of the contamination, it could simply be a reference to His sovereignty over all things. The mold or mildew was not the result of contamination, but instead, it was “put” there by God, and its presence made the home unclean and non-occupiable. As soon as the problem was apparent, the Israelite owner of the home was required to notify the priest. This instigated an extensive inspection and purification process designed to render the contaminated home clean and acceptable to God.

“The settlement had to be free of pollution and corruption and anything that might cause disease. In the wilderness it was easy to burn tents. But when the people settled in the land, the law had to be brought forward and made relevant to their present situation.” – Allen P. Ross, Holiness to the Lord: A Guide to the Exposition of the Book of Leviticus

God demanded purity among His people. As a holy God, He expected His people to reflect His nature. And these verses indicate that His concern for their holiness included every aspect of their lives, including the homes in which they lived. This comprehensive regard for holiness was intended to teach the Israelites about the ever-present and pervasive problem of sin within the camp. Decay, disease, and death were everywhere and their impact was unavoidable. Even the annoying presence of mold and mildew was a reminder that the fall had caused sin to seep into every nook and cranny of human life.

So, when a home was found to have mold or mildew, the priest was to place it under a seven-day quarantine. No one was allowed to enter the home during that time. When the seven days were up, the priest was to reexamine the house. If the contamination had spread, the affected stones were to be removed and cast outside the city. Then a process of remediation was begun, requiring all the plaster to be removed from the walls and discarded along with the infected stone. If this drastic remedy was unsuccessful and the mildew reappeared, the home was to be condemned and destroyed, with every scrap of wood and stone hauled out of the city.

God made it clear that the presence of mildew or mold made the house unclean. So, anyone who ventured into the house while the contamination remained was to be declared unclean and in need of purification.

“Those who enter the house during the period of quarantine will be ceremonially unclean until evening, and all who sleep or eat in the house must wash their clothing.” – Leviticus 14:46-47 NLT

This command does not seem to deal with actual physical contamination, but instead, it points out the reality of ceremonial uncleanness. Since the home was deemed unclean, anyone who came into contact with it was deemed unclean as well. Even if the mold or mildew was no threat to humans, any contact with that which God had deemed unclean put them at spiritual risk. Purity was a fragile thing and needed to be protected at all costs.

If after purging the home, all traces of mold and mildew disappeared, the home was to be declared clean. But before it could be reoccupied, a purification ceremony must be performed. This is the same rite performed for a person healed of a skin disease. It involved the sacrifice of two birds.

“To purify the house the priest must take two birds, a stick of cedar, some scarlet yarn, and a hyssop branch. He will slaughter one of the birds over a clay pot filled with fresh water. He will take the cedar stick, the hyssop branch, the scarlet yarn, and the live bird, and dip them into the blood of the slaughtered bird and into the fresh water. Then he will sprinkle the house seven times.” – Leviticus 14:49-51 NLT

The second bird was then released into the wilderness, signifying that the death of the first bird had resulted in restoration and life. The formerly infected home was now cleansed and ready for occupation. Life could go on. Meals could be eaten. Children could be born. Rest could be attained. And the blessings of God could be enjoyed.

God’s greatest concern was the holiness of His people. He knew they would struggle with purity and would constantly battle the damaging side effects of sin. Especially in the land of Canaan, they would find themselves surrounded by pagan nations. They would live in cities and homes built by these very same people. The contamination of sin would be everywhere, both physically and spiritually, and God wanted His people to know and understand the difference between that which is “ceremonially clean or unclean” (Leviticus 14:57 NLT).

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

A Healthy Home Life

1 Be not envious of evil men,
    nor desire to be with them,
2 for their hearts devise violence,
    and their lips talk of trouble.

3 By wisdom a house is built,
    and by understanding it is established;
4 by knowledge the rooms are filled
    with all precious and pleasant riches.
5 A wise man is full of strength,
    and a man of knowledge enhances his might,
6 for by wise guidance you can wage your war,
    and in abundance of counselors there is victory.
7 Wisdom is too high for a fool;
    in the gate he does not open his mouth.

8 Whoever plans to do evil
    will be called a schemer.
9 The devising of folly is sin,
    and the scoffer is an abomination to mankind.

10 If you faint in the day of adversity,
    your strength is small.
11 Rescue those who are being taken away to death;
    hold back those who are stumbling to the slaughter.
12 If you say, “Behold, we did not know this,”
    does not he who weighs the heart perceive it?
Does not he who keeps watch over your soul know it,
    and will he not repay man according to his work?

13 My son, eat honey, for it is good,
    and the drippings of the honeycomb are sweet to your taste.
14 Know that wisdom is such to your soul;
    if you find it, there will be a future,
    and your hope will not be cut off.

15 Lie not in wait as a wicked man against the dwelling of the righteous;
    do no violence to his home;
16 for the righteous falls seven times and rises again,
    but the wicked stumble in times of calamity.

17 Do not rejoice when your enemy falls,
    and let not your heart be glad when he stumbles,
18 lest the Lord see it and be displeased,
    and turn away his anger from him.

19 Fret not yourself because of evildoers,
    and be not envious of the wicked,
20 for the evil man has no future;
    the lamp of the wicked will be put out.

21 My son, fear the Lord and the king,
    and do not join with those who do otherwise,
22 for disaster will arise suddenly from them,
    and who knows the ruin that will come from them both? – Proverbs 24:1-22 ESV

If one had to choose a summary statement for this section of Solomon’s book, verses 3-7 would work well. In them, Solomon provides a fitting synopsis for his collection of 36 wise sayings and clearly articulates the primary message he is attempting to convey.

A house is built by wisdom
    and becomes strong through good sense.
Through knowledge its rooms are filled
    with all sorts of precious riches and valuables. – Proverbs 24:3-4 NLT

Solomon was a highly successful king who ruled over a prosperous kingdom but he was also a father who cared deeply for his children, of which he had many. With 700 wives and 300 concubines, Solomon had no shortage of progeny. Kids would have been everywhere and it seems that he took a keen interest in their education and preparation for life beyond the palace. Solomon took his role as a powerful potentate seriously but he also placed a high priority on parenting. And in a patriarchal society, he took a special interest in raising up sons who would live wise and godly lives.

In Solomon’s day, there would have been very few books on the topic of parenting. Today, they’re everywhere. You can even attend any of a number of seminars on the topic or watch countless YouTube videos on the subject. You can get parenting advice, both good and bad, from all kinds of people. They'll tell you about the importance of communication, the need for consistent discipline, the danger of a home without rules, and the damage that can be done if your home is too strict.

Everyone has opinions. Everyone is ready to give their advice. But there are few who truly know the secret to having a healthy, thriving family – except Solomon. The Hebrew word he used for "house" in verse four can also be translated as "family" and is probably best seen as a metaphor for establishing a strong, vibrant home life, not building a structure.

We all know that a well-built house is no guarantee of a healthy, whole family. There are many beautiful homes in the best of neighborhoods filled with children who despise their parents. Those same houses are occupied by husbands and wives who no longer love one another and where domestic bliss is nowhere to be found.

No, Solomon is not giving us construction tips, but the key to a healthy family. And this advice applies not only to our biological family but to our spiritual family as well. The church, the body of Christ, is also a family. As believers, we are all members of the family of God and are His children. And just like our biological family, the family of God can become dysfunctional and unhealthy if we ignore the counsel of Solomon.

He tells us a home or a family is built on wisdom. This should remind us of Solomon's advice found in the very first chapter of his book: "Start with God – the first step in learning is bowing down to God" (Proverbs 1:7 MSG).

This is a paraphrase from The Message, but it paints a very accurate description of what it means to "fear the Lord." To fear the Lord is to recognize that He is God and we are not. It is to understand that He is the sole source of all wisdom, not us. It is to humble ourselves under His mighty power, recognizing our own weakness. The key to gaining wisdom is to start with God. It is focusing all of our attention on Him and making Him the center of our lives. This is true when it comes to our homes or families. He has to be number one. Not our kids. Not our careers. Not our marriages. Not our own selfish wills and self-centered desires. We must start with God. Our homes must be built on Him. He must be the foundation on which we construct our families. Marriage is difficult. Raising kids is a real challenge. Having a healthy family in the world in which we live is next to impossible – unless you do it with God's help. Only He can give us the wisdom we need, the good sense we require, the knowledge life demands, and the outcome we desire.

Solomon wanted his sons to grow up to be wise and he knew that godliness was a prerequisite for both goodness and greatness.

The wise are mightier than the strong,
    and those with knowledge grow stronger and stronger.
So don’t go to war without wise guidance;
   victory depends on having many advisers. – Proverbs 24:5-6 NLT

If they were going to be successful in life, they would have to make God their highest priority. God can't be an add-on or an afterthought. He would need to be the focus of their lives and their families. Solomon desperately desired that his sons would make God’s Word a daily part of our lives and the manual by which they parented their own children. The truths he was sharing were meant to be passed on – from generation to generation. These wise sayings were timeless and worthy of obeying and repeating.

Don’t envy evil people
    or desire their company.
For their hearts plot violence,
    and their words always stir up trouble. – Proverbs 24:1-2 NLT

A person who plans evil
    will get a reputation as a troublemaker.
The schemes of a fool are sinful;
    everyone detests a mocker. – Proverbs 24:8-9 NLT

Yes, Solomon wanted his sons to implement these timeless truths but he also longed to see them propagated through the future generations of his descendants. Solomon understood that godly wisdom was to be passed on to others. It must be modeled. And, like so much in life, wisdom is better caught than taught. Children must see that their parents not only believe in God but that they obey Him. They must see that their parent’s faith is real and that it manifests itself in real life.

Solomon tells us that if we begin with God and constantly turn to God, He will give us wisdom, good sense, and knowledge. And as a result, our homes will be filled with "all sorts of precious riches and valuables" (Proverbs 24:4 NLT). But to enjoy all the benefits that wisdom has to offer, it must be sought after and consumed.

My child, eat honey, for it is good,
    and the honeycomb is sweet to the taste.
In the same way, wisdom is sweet to your soul.
    If you find it, you will have a bright future,
    and your hopes will not be cut short. – Proverbs 24:13-14 NLT

His promise of a bright future is a guarantee of financial success, but a reminder that living God's way produces treasures that are priceless and not of this world. In comparison, Solomon states that “evil people have no future” (Proverbs 24:20 NLT). Their prosperity is temporary while their long-term prospects are bleak.

He will repay all people as their actions deserve. – Proverbs 24:12 NLT

Solomon promotes a godly lifestyle. He encourages his sons to seek the way of the wise. Yes, they may find themselves the envy of all those around them and even discover that they are under attack for their chosen way of life, but they must remain determined to pursue righteousness and not wickedness.

Don’t wait in ambush at the home of the godly,
    and don’t raid the house where the godly live.
The godly may trip seven times, but they will get up again. – Proverbs 24:15-16 NLT

Solomon calmly and confidently tells his sons: “Don’t fret because of evildoers…” (Proverbs 24:19 NLT). Don’t let them distract you with their attacks. And don’t become jealous of their apparent success. No, when all is said and done, Solomon wanted his sons to live in a state of reverent fear of God. From Solomon’s perspective, there were only two entities in life that should instill a sense of fear and awe. One was God and the other was the king. They alone had the power to punish the wicked. 

My child, fear the Lord and the king.
Don’t associate with rebels,
    for disaster will hit them suddenly.
Who knows what punishment will come
    from the Lord and the king? – Proverbs 24:21-22 NLT

For Solomon, there was no higher priority than to raise godly sons who would establish godly homes and raise godly children. And it all tied back to a warning that God had given when Solomon had dedicated the temple he had built in Jerusalem.

“As for you, if you will follow me with integrity and godliness, as David your father did, obeying all my commands, decrees, and regulations, then I will establish the throne of your dynasty over Israel forever. For I made this promise to your father, David: ‘One of your descendants will always sit on the throne of Israel.’

“But if you or your descendants abandon me and disobey the commands and decrees I have given you, and if you serve and worship other gods, then I will uproot Israel from this land that I have given them. I will reject this Temple that I have made holy to honor my name. I will make Israel an object of mockery and ridicule among the nations.” – 1 Kings 9:4-7 NLT

Solomon wasn’t simply interested in passing on helpful tips for living life. He was intent on securing the future of his home and family for generations to come. His greatest desire was that his future descendants would follow the Lord with integrity and godliness.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

New English Translation (NET)NET Bible® copyright ©1996-2017 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. http://netbible.com All rights reserved.

Turning Homes Into Lighthouses

1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), 3 “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” 4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. – Ephesians 6:1-4 ESV

Next, Peter turns his attention to the parent-child relationship, where the filling of the Spirit could help the believers in Ephesus to dispel the darkness engulfing their community. A home where godly parents and children lived in submission to the will of God would be a beacon of light and life to the lost. Their Spirit-empowered interactions with one another would bring glory and honor to God as they lived in keeping with His good and perfect will.

Paul begins by addressing the children within the Ephesian church. He calls on them to obey their parents “in the Lord” (en kyrios). In his earlier passage addressed to believing wives, he called on them to submit to their believing husbands “as unto the Lord” (hōs ho kyrios). The idea is the same here. Paul is calling on children to obey “in the Lord.” The obedience of the children was not to be dependent upon the belief of their parents, but they were to obey because it was the will of God. Paul was essentially telling young children who came to faith in Christ, “you need to understand what the Lord wants you to do” (Ephesians 5:17). Regardless of age, every member of the body of Christ was to “submit to one another out of reverence for Christ” (Ephesians 5:21 ESV).

It would seem that Paul has believing children in mind because he calls them to obey “in the Lord.” He seems to assume that these children are old enough to understand their Christ-honoring commitment to submit to their parents in the same way they would submit to Christ Himself. And Paul quotes from the Hebrew Scriptures to drive home his point. 

Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God commanded you, that your days may be long, and that it may go well with you in the land that the Lord your God is giving you. – Deuteronomy 5:16 NLT

In this passage, Moses is reciting the Ten Commandments to the people of Israel, and this verse, he shares God’s command that His people show proper honor and respect to their earthly parents. This commandment was applicable to children of all ages, including those who had reached adulthood. In a society that had no welfare system, it was the responsibility of adult children to take care of their elderly parents. God was ordering His covenant people to treat their loved ones with dignity and respect, and He tied future fruitfulness to present faithfulness. If they continued to treat their parents with honor all the days of their lives, then they would enjoy a long and fruitful stay in the land of promise. This is why Peter refers to this as a “commandment with a promise” (Ephesians 6:2 ESV). As long as the people obeyed it, they would enjoy the blessings of God. Faithfulness to do the will of God would be accompanied by fruitfulness.

It’s interesting to note that, in his second letter to Timothy, Paul included disoBelibedience to parents among the list of godless characteristics that will mark the end of the age.

…in the last days there will be very difficult times. For people will love only themselves and their money. They will be boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient to their parents, and ungrateful. They will consider nothing sacred. They will be unloving and unforgiving; they will slander others and have no self-control. They will be cruel and hate what is good. They will betray their friends, be reckless, be puffed up with pride, and love pleasure rather than God. They will act religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. Stay away from people like that! – 2 Timothy 3:1-5 NLT

It seems that Paul is describing people who are old enough to know what they are doing. Their behavior reflects the status of their hearts. Their outer actions are simply byproducts of their inner condition. Jesus made this point quite clear when He stated, “the words you speak come from the heart—that’s what defiles you. For from the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, all sexual immorality, theft, lying, and slander. These are what defile you” (Matthew 15:18-20 NLT).

Paul doesn’t seem to be focusing his attention on small children. They were not the problem. It was those children who were old enough to come to faith in Christ but also old enough to be tempted by the inevitable allure of autonomy and freedom from their parents’ control over their lives. He is calling them to remember their commitment to do that which is pleasing to God. They were to emulate Christ, who willingly submitted Himself to do His Father’s will.

“For I have come down from heaven, not to do my own will but the will of him who sent me.” – John 6:38 ESV

“I seek not my own will but the will of him who sent me.” – John 5:30 ESV

Paul states that children who obey their parents are doing what is right. The Greek word is dikaios, and it means “that which is righteous, in keeping with the commands of God” (Outline of Biblical Usage). To obey earthly parents is righteous because it is in keeping with our Heavenly Father’s will. It is what He desires, therefore, it is right and good.

This command is intended to last a lifetime. It doesn’t end at the age of 18 or whenever the child moves out of the home. No, it lasts as long as the parents remain alive. And in a culture where the family unit tended to stay intact for much longer periods of time, this command carried special significance. It was not uncommon for young married couples to take up residence in the home of the husband’s parents. Multiple generations would end up residing under the same roof, making obedience to this command more essential than ever. A home where parents, children, and grandchildren lived together was the perfect environment for displaying the Spirit-filled lifestyle to which Paul was calling his audience.

And it was within this kind of familial context that Paul called on fathers to treat their children with love and respect, raising them in accordance with the will of God. And that included “the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4 NLT). Once again, Paul is emphasizing the need for all believers to do things according to God’s will, not their own. And they were not to use the prevailing cultural context as their model for godly behavior. Paul has already warned the Ephesian believers not to pattern their behavior after the world.

Don’t participate in the things these people do. For once you were full of darkness, but now you have light from the Lord. So live as people of light! For this light within you produces only what is good and right and true. – Ephesians 5:7-9 NLT

Instead, they were to “carefully determine what pleases the Lord” (Ephesians 5:10 NLT). And for fathers, that meant leading their children in such a way that it produced godliness rather than bitterness. Paul demands that father’s not “provoke” or exasperate their children. Believing fathers were to submit themselves to the will of God and minister to their wives and children in a loving and self-sacrificing manner. Their God-ordained role as the heads of their households didn’t give them the right to lord over those under their care. They were to be servants and shepherds. They to were to model Christ-likeness as they provided instruction in godliness.

God holds Christian fathers responsible for the care of His flock. A godly father is to recognize that his children are gifts from God.

Children are a gift from the Lord;
    they are a reward from him. – Psalm 127:3 NLT

And because God has assigned believing fathers with the role of shepherding His young lambs, He will hold them responsible if they fail to care for them well. The warning that God applied to the spiritual shepherds of Israel can be applied to those Christian fathers who abdicate their God-given responsibility to shepherd their children as God has commanded.

“What sorrow awaits you shepherds who feed yourselves instead of your flocks. Shouldn’t shepherds feed their sheep? You drink the milk, wear the wool, and butcher the best animals, but you let your flocks starve. You have not taken care of the weak. You have not tended the sick or bound up the injured. You have not gone looking for those who have wandered away and are lost. Instead, you have ruled them with harshness and cruelty. So my sheep have been scattered without a shepherd, and they are easy prey for any wild animal. They have wandered through all the mountains and all the hills, across the face of the earth, yet no one has gone to search for them.” – Ezekiel 34:2-6 NLT

And God went on to describe what He would do to those shepherds who failed to carry out their God-ordained role.

“I now consider these shepherds my enemies, and I will hold them responsible for what has happened to my flock. I will take away their right to feed the flock, and I will stop them from feeding themselves. I will rescue my flock from their mouths; the sheep will no longer be their prey.” – Ezekiel 34:10 NLT

In a similar way, Paul is pleading with the fathers within the church at Ephesus to step up and do what they have been called to do. They were to model the self-sacrificing love of Christ. They were to teach their children to honor God by demonstrating it through their own lives. Their homes were to be lighthouses, illuminating the darkness of Ephesus with the glory of God’s grace and the life-changing power of His Spirit.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

New English Translation (NET)NET Bible® copyright ©1996-2017 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. http://netbible.com All rights reserved.

Redeemed Relationships.

Ephesians 5:21-6:9

And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. – Ephesians 5:21 NLT

Our relationship with Jesus Christ should change everything – especially our relationships with others. Saving faith is practical and applicable. It should make a difference in the way we relate to and interact with others in our lives. Paul uses the term "submit," which was typically used in a military context. It referred to the attitude of a soldier who was expected to have"a voluntary attitude of giving in, cooperating, assuming responsibility, and carrying a burden." It carried with it the sense of being part of a larger whole, and serving within a unit that shared a common cause and answered to a higher authority. So Paul tells us to "submit to one another." Notice that this is a command to any and all within the body of Christ. Too often we skip this verse and go right to the next verse where wives are told to submit to their husbands. This verse has caused much confusion, anger and anxiety over the years, especially within the minds of modern Christians. Many women find the idea of submission as antiquated and outdated. Some find it outright demeaning. But to understand what Paul is saying, we must keep all of the verses within their context. Paul is calling ALL believers to submit and he gives various examples of what that submission will look like for each of them.

Remember, Paul has just finished talking about being filled or controlled by the Spirit. Now he provides us with submission as a result of that filling. When we are living under the influence of the Spirit, we will submit to one another as to the Lord. Paul is going to deal with three pairs of people: husbands and wives, children and parents, and slaves and masters. The primary subject when talking about each is submission, made possible by the filling of the Spirit. It is critical to understand that each example is an illustration of submission. Women are told to submit to their husbands. This is not a command to subservience and is not meant to communicate that women have a lesser value or worth. It reflects a Spirit-empowered willingness on the part of wives to serve their husbands as they would Jesus Christ. This is not a call to passivity or a command to become a doormat. It is a call to Christ-like servanthood and submission. The key phrase here is "as to the Lord." That theme runs throughout these verses. God has established an order and a structure to the family. He has made the husband the head of the home, just as Christ is the head of the church. Headship comes with authority, but also responsibility. The husband will answer to God for how he lead and cared for his family, including his wife. When a wife submits to her husband, she is simply coming under God's ordained structure for the home. The wife's ability to submit is directly tied to the next verses that deal with the husband's responsibility to love. Paul tells husbands that for them, submission takes the form of selfless, sacrificial love. They are to love their wives as Christ loved the church. Christ gave His life for the church. He placed the needs of the body of Christ above His own. He loved the church so much that He was willing to die for it. And that is the degree to which husbands are to "submit" to their wives. They are to love them so much that they are willing to sacrifice everything for their holiness. The kind of love husbands are called to express toward their wives was not to be based on her performance or merit, but was an unconditional acceptance based on her intrinsic worth as God’s gift to her husband. That kind of love will create an atmosphere where willing submission is easy.

Paul now turns his attention to parents and children. Children are commanded to obey and honor their parents. Again, this is an illustration of Spirit-empowered submission within the home. And it's important to recognize that Paul tells children that their obedience stems from their relationship to the Lord. All of these relationships are to be God-centered and Spirit-filled. But there's a second half to this equation. Fathers, as the head of the home, are commanded not to exasperate and frustrate their children by unloving and inconsistent parenting. Lack of loving leadership on the part of the father and an absence of structure and protective rules can end up causing children to become angry and, ultimately, rebellious. Love masquerading as license and leniency, can be damaging and destructive. Fathers are to provide an environment that is loving and disciplined, creating an atmosphere where obedience and honor come naturally.

Finally, Paul takes on a somewhat awkward topic of slave and masters. As modern-day Christians, we find this discussion distasteful and outdated. After all, we live in a nation that outlawed slavery a long time ago. But in Paul's day it was alive and well. In fact, the local churches typically had members who were slaves, and oftentimes they attended the same church their masters did. Becoming a believer did not set slaves free from slavery. It did not change their circumstance, but it did radically alter the way in which they were to relate within that circumstance. Because of the indwelling presence of the Holy Spirit, slaves were expected to do their jobs differently. They were expected to relate to their masters differently. They were to obey with "deep respect and fear." And they were to do it as they would serve Christ. Their subservience was now to become willing submission, performed for the Lord, not for their earthly masters. Their work ethic was to be motivated by their love for the Lord. They were still slaves, but they were slaves who had been changed by Christ and had a new capacity to love – even within the context of their slavery. And those masters who happened to be believers, were to treat their slaves with dignity and respect, knowing that they would be held accountable for their actions to God some day. Paul makes a significant statement regarding God's view of slaves and masters. He says, "remember, you both have the same Master in heaven, and he has no favorites" (Ephesians 6:9 NLT). God doesn't see as man sees. While He has ordained there to be order, structure and degrees of authority in the world, He sees all men as equal. He sees husbands and wives as equal. He sees parents and children as equal. And He sees slaves and masters as equal. The key issue is how His Spirit can radically change those relationships and give them a new capacity to interact and interrelate in such as way that He is honored. Spirit-filled, Spirit-controlled believers bring a whole new meaning to their relationships. They view their roles and responsibilities differently. They see their positions as opportunities to serve others and honor God. They do their work as unto the Lord. They serve others as they would serve Christ. They submit to others as they would submit to Him. They love as He would love. They obey as if He were the one giving the command. Living under the influence of the Spirit is a life-changing, relationship-altering experience.

Father, may we learn to live under the influence of the Spirit more and more. We can't always change our circumstances, but we can change the way we relate in the midst of them. Our marriages need to be Spirit-controlled. Our homes need to be Spirit-filled. Our work relationships need to be Spirit-empowered. Show us how to make our faith practical and applicable to each and every one of our relationships. Amen.

The Key To A Strong, Healthy Family.

Proverbs 24

“A house is built by wisdom and becomes strong through common sense. Through knowledge its rooms are filled with all sorts of precious riches and valuables.” – Proverbs 24:3-4 NLT

You can read countless books on parenting. You can attend any of a number of seminars on the topic. You can get parenting advice, both good and bad, from all kinds of people. They'll tell you about the importance of communication, the need for consistent discipline, the danger of a home without rules, but the damage that can be done if your home is too strict. Everyone has opinions. Everyone is ready to give their advice. But there are few who truly know the secret to having a healthy, thriving family – except Solomon. The word he uses for "house" in this passage can be translated "family" and is probably best seen as a metaphor for establishing a strong, vibrant home life, not about building a structure. We all know that a well-built home is no guarantee of a healthy, whole family. There are many beautiful homes in the best of neighborhoods filled with children who despise their parents, husbands and wives who have fallen out of love long ago, and where domestic bliss is nowhere to be found. No, Solomon is not giving us construction tips, but the key to a healthy family. And this advice applies not only to our biological family, but to our spiritual family as well. The church, the body of Christ, is also a family. As believers, we are all members of the family of God and are His children. And just like our biological family, the family of God can become dysfunctional and unhealthy if we ignore the counsel of Solomon.

He tells us a home, a family is built by wisdom. Which reminds me of Solomon's advice found in the very first chapter of his book: "Start with God – the first step in learning is bowing down to God" (Proverbs 1:7 MSG). This is a paraphrase from The Message, but I find it paints a very accurate description of what it means to "fear the Lord." To fear the Lord is to recognize that He is God and we are not. It is to understand that He is the source of all wisdom, not us. It is to humble ourselves under His mighty power, recognizing our own weakness. The key to gaining wisdom is starting with God. It is focusing all of our attention on Him and making Him the center of our lives. This is true when it comes to our homes or families. He has to be number one. Not our kids. Not our careers. Not our marriages. Not our own selfish wills and self-centered desires. We must start with God. Our homes must be built on Him. He must be the foundation on which we construct our families. Marriage is difficult. Raising kids is a real challenge. Having a healthy family in the world in which we live is next to impossible – unless you do it with God's help. Only He can give us the wisdom we need, the good sense we require, the knowledge life demands, and the outcome we desire.

But God can't be an add-on or an afterthought. He must be the focus of our families. We must make His Word a daily part of our lives and the manual by which we parent. Our kids must see that we not only believe in God, but that we obey Him. They must see that our faith is real and that it lives itself out in real life. Solomon tells us that if we begin with God, if we turn to God, He will gives us wisdom, good sense and knowledge. And as a result, our homes will be filled with "all sorts of precious riches and valuables" (Proverbs 24:4 NLT). This is not a promise of financial success, but a reminder that living God's way produces treasures that are priceless and not of this world. We will experience His peace even when our kids rebel, endurance when our marriage is less than perfect, patience when life becomes difficult, and a growing awareness of the presence of God that is more valuable than anything money can buy.

Father, I want to build my home on You. I can't do this without You. And I know because I have tried far too many times. I want to start with You. I want to continue with You. I want to end with You. Amen.