1 There was a long war between the house of Saul and the house of David. And David grew stronger and stronger, while the house of Saul became weaker and weaker.
2 And sons were born to David at Hebron: his firstborn was Amnon, of Ahinoam of Jezreel; 3 and his second, Chileab, of Abigail the widow of Nabal of Carmel; and the third, Absalom the son of Maacah the daughter of Talmai king of Geshur; 4 and the fourth, Adonijah the son of Haggith; and the fifth, Shephatiah the son of Abital; 5 and the sixth, Ithream, of Eglah, David’s wife. These were born to David in Hebron. – 2 Samuel 3:1-5 ESV
These five short verses reveal that David was fighting battles on two fronts. The first was the ongoing conflict he faced with the house of Saul. Ish-bosheth remained the recognized king of Israel, having received the endorsement of 11 of the 12 tribes, and Abner continued to serve as his military advisor.
But David faced another formidable foe that would prove far more difficult to defeat than Abner and his puppet king. The sad reality is that David’s second battle front was of his own making and he remained oblivious to its presence and danger. This “man after God’s own heart” had a heart problem. It wasn’t a physiological flaw in his actual heart but a moral weakness in his inner man.
This man, who had been handpicked by God and designated to be the next king of Israel suffered from a debilitating and oftentimes deadly condition that would prove to be far more dangerous than Ish-bosheth, Abner, and the armies of Israel. Despite Saul’s manic and rather obsessive-compulsive behavior, he had proven unsuccessful in eliminating David as a threat to his throne. Now, Saul’s son Ish-bosheth wore the crown and seemed to be blocking David’s path to his God-ordained destiny. But David’s real enemy lurked much closer to home, within his own household, and would prove to be the offspring of his own heart.
But this less-than-flattering fact seems to stand in conflict with God’s glowing assessment of David. Years earlier, God had the prophet Samuel inform the disobedient Saul that his reign would soon be coming to an end.
“But now your kingdom must end, for the LORD has sought out a man after his own heart. The LORD has already appointed him to be the leader of his people, because you have not kept the LORD’s command.” – 1 Samuel 13:14 NLT
Centuries later, the apostle Paul, while preaching to the Jews in the synagogue at Antioch, reconfirmed this divine designation of David as a man after His own heart.
“After that, God gave them judges to rule until the time of Samuel the prophet. Then the people begged for a king, and God gave them Saul son of Kish, a man of the tribe of Benjamin, who reigned for forty years. But God removed Saul and replaced him with David, a man about whom God said, ‘I have found David son of Jesse, a man after my own heart. He will do everything I want him to do.” – Acts 13:20-22 NLT
But this lofty description of David did not mean he was perfect or without sin. Like any other man, David struggled with his own sinful nature. He could be prone to disobedience and doubt, just like anybody else. He had his own unique set of sins with which he struggled. One sin, in particular, is hinted at in verses 2 through 5 of 2 Samuel 3, and it would prove to be a constant source of temptation and testing for him: His love of women.
While David grew stronger in his military position over Abner and the house of Saul, he was literally sowing the seeds of dissent and future discord that would rip his still fledgling kingdom apart. It is important to note that God had made ample preparations for Israel to have a king. In fact, He had preordained it but knew that the people would tend to want the wrong kind of king. So, He provided them with very clear commands:
“You are about to enter the land the Lord your God is giving you. When you take it over and settle there, you may think, ‘We should select a king to rule over us like the other nations around us.’ If this happens, be sure to select as king the man the Lord your God chooses. You must appoint a fellow Israelite; he may not be a foreigner.
“The king must not build up a large stable of horses for himself or send his people to Egypt to buy horses, for the Lord has told you, ‘You must never return to Egypt.’ The king must not take many wives for himself, because they will turn his heart away from the Lord. And he must not accumulate large amounts of wealth in silver and gold for himself.” – Deuteronomy 17:14-117 NLT
Somewhat hidden and overlooked in this divine command is God’s prohibition against polygamy. But God made it crystal clear that His king “must not take many wives for himself, because they will turn his heart away from the Lord.”
Yet, the opening verses of chapter 3 reveal that the man after God’s own heart had a hidden heart problem. Verse 2 states that “sons were born to David at Hebron.” That rather innocent-sounding statement is fraught with unseen baggage that will prove to be an ongoing problem for David. A quick scan of the following verses reveals the invisible pathogen lurking in David’s heart.
These verses reveal that David had four different wives: Ahinoam of Jezreel, Abigail the widow of Nabal of Carmel, Maacah the daughter of Talmai king of Geshur, and Eglah. Not on this list is Michal, the daughter of Saul and David’s first wife. So effectively, at this early point in his reign, David had no less than five wives and, before he was done, the list would grow to as many as eight.
It doesn’t take a stretch of the imagination to determine that David had an inordinate attraction to women, and he tended to act on it. One of his wives was Abigail, who was the widow of Nabal. This God-fearing woman had prevented David from killing her foolish husband, but when God took Nabal’s life, David wasted no time in taking Abigail as his wife.
David could be impulsive, and if we fast-forward to one of the most famous or infamous events in his life, it will become readily apparent that his impulsiveness led him to commit not only adultery but murder. Second Samuel 11 records the story of David and Bathsheba, a less-than-flattering moment in David’s life that would prove to be a personal low point.
At a time when David should have been leading his troops in battle, he determined to remain safely ensconced in his royal palace. One day, while walking on the roof, he saw a woman named Bathsheba bathing on the roof of her own home. Some speculate that this was not the first time David had witnessed this scene; it could have been the very reason he stayed home from battle. But on this occasion, David’s act of voyeurism prompted him to have Bathsheba brought to the palace. What happened next became a permanent blot on David’s record. Their illicit liaison resulted in an unexpected pregnancy but that would not be the worst part of the story.
Bathsheba’s husband, who served as a soldier in David’s army, was off at war, so it was going to be difficult to explain how his wife became pregnant. That’s when David launched an all-out campaign to cover his sin. But his strategy failed and he ultimately resorted to having Bathsheba’s husband murdered. He ordered that this innocent man be exposed to enemy fire on the front lines, thus opening the door for David to take Bathsheba as his wife.
This was not a stellar moment for David but it provides a glimpse into this highly vulnerable area of his life. His love affair with women would prove to be problematic throughout his reign. In fact, a close look at the list of his sons contains the names of Amnon and Absalom. These two brothers born to different mothers would grow up to cause David much pain and suffering. Second Samuel 13 contains the sad story of Amnon’s rape of Tamar, his half-sister. To avenge the rape of his own sister, Absalom orchestrated Amnon’s murder. which resulted in his own exile. He would later return, only to orchestrate the overthrow of his own father’s kingdom.
Verses 1-5 of chapter 3 appear innocent enough but they foreshadow a future filled with brokenness, pain, and suffering. It all began with David’s unwillingness to obey the command of God. This man after God’s heart decided to play fast and loose with God’s revealed will and while David never seemed to allow his many wives to lead him away from his love and worship for God, one of his sons would. Solomon would not only inherit his father’s throne but his addictive tendencies as well. In fact, Solomon would outdo his father in a major way, eventually amassing for himself a staggering harem of 700 wives and 300 concubines (1 Kings 11:1-3). These women, many of whom were from foreign nations and worshiped pagan gods, would eventually cause Solomon to erect their idols throughout his own kingdom – just as God had warned. The book of 1 Kings paints a very bleak picture of the closing days of Solomon’s reign.
Now King Solomon loved many foreign women, along with the daughter of Pharaoh: Moabite, Ammonite, Edomite, Sidonian, and Hittite women, from the nations concerning which the Lord had said to the people of Israel, “You shall not enter into marriage with them, neither shall they with you, for surely they will turn away your heart after their gods.” Solomon clung to these in love. He had 700 wives, who were princesses, and 300 concubines. And his wives turned away his heart. For when Solomon was old his wives turned away his heart after other gods, and his heart was not wholly true to the Lord his God, as was the heart of David his father. For Solomon went after Ashtoreth the goddess of the Sidonians, and after Milcom the abomination of the Ammonites. So Solomon did what was evil in the sight of the Lord and did not wholly follow the Lord, as David his father had done. Then Solomon built a high place for Chemosh the abomination of Moab, and for Molech the abomination of the Ammonites, on the mountain east of Jerusalem. And so he did for all his foreign wives, who made offerings and sacrificed to their gods. – 1 Kings 11:1-8 ESV
And it all began with David. A little compromise. A giving into the desires of the flesh. A refusal to obey God fully and heed His warning. The long-term ramifications of sin can be devastating. Yes, when David repented of his sin with Bathsheba, he was forgiven by God but the child she bore died in infancy. There are consequences to disobedience. God blessed David’s kingdom, but his many wives would prove to be a constant source of trouble in his life. His battle with the house of Saul would be nothing compared to the spiritual war he would wage as a result of his own sinful nature.
None of this was news to God. He was well aware of David’s strengths and weaknesses. He knew the condition of David’s heart better than David himself, and He was exposing all the flaws so that the man after His own heart might have a heart that beat fast for Him – and nothing else.
“The human heart is the most deceitful of all things,
and desperately wicked.
Who really knows how bad it is?
But I, the Lord, search all hearts
and examine secret motives.
I give all people their due rewards,
according to what their actions deserve.” – Jeremiah 17:9-10 NLT
English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.
New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
